Omanyte Pokemon
bluewheatfields:

"Are you okay? Are you - Don’t answer that. I’m absolutely sure you’re fine. There’s plenty of time for you to recover. Just take it slow—""Please prepare for emergency evacuation.""STAY CALM! ‘Prepare’ - that’s all they’re saying. ‘Prepare.’ It’s all fine."

I just have a lot of Wheatley feels
I have a lot of AI feels
I have a lot of moron feels

bluewheatfields:

"Are you okay? Are you - Don’t answer that. I’m absolutely sure you’re fine. There’s plenty of time for you to recover. Just take it slow—"

"Please prepare for emergency evacuation."

"STAY CALM! ‘Prepare’ - that’s all they’re saying. ‘Prepare.’ It’s all fine."

I just have a lot of Wheatley feels

I have a lot of AI feels

I have a lot of moron feels

deadmau5:

Decal time!!! For science!

If I saw this parked in my street….I don’t know I think I’d go hide

deadmau5:

Decal time!!! For science!

If I saw this parked in my street
….I don’t know I think I’d go hide

COMPANION CUBE
I’M SORRY
SHE MADE ME DO IT
PLEASE DON’T INCINERATE ME

COMPANION CUBE

I’M SORRY

SHE MADE ME DO IT

PLEASE DON’T INCINERATE ME

lizwuzthere:

beforethegloam:

Uhhhh…. RUN


Seems legit

lizwuzthere:

beforethegloam:

Uhhhh…. RUN

Seems legit

cubiewi:

“They told me that about everything!”

I JUST SNORTED

cubiewi:

“They told me that about everything!”

I JUST SNORTED

You’re now watching two strangers discuss your question!

Question to discuss:
LOOK. LOOK. I’M IN SPACE, OKAY? I didn’t know portals worked on the bloody moon, did I? I AM NOT A MORON. …I need to…. Earth can you read this? I need to get back to Aperture….

SO MANY DISCONNECTS
WHY DO YOU ALL HATE WHEATLEY
HEATHENS
When I get somebody interested, the second person disconnects
FUCK YOU I NEED TO GET BACK TO EARTH

I’ve got a ‘great game XD’ but I’ve also got a ‘fuck off’

Aw hell surely it’s better than dolan? I’m not a good troll :( I’m just a nerdy girl

beetleboo:

turiansexual:

Best friend: Rick (accurate)

Partner: Atlas (:D aw yayyyy!)

First kiss: Companion cube (dsjhfjdsh haha ok)

Lover: Cave Johnson (ACCURATE…)

End boss: GLaDOS (yep p much)

Murderer: …Cave… Johnson?  Damnit Cave.  (Well that’s a tragic love story.)

Best Friend: Cave Johnson

Partner: Pbody

First Kiss: Atlas (but HOW)

Lover: Rick (OH ADVENTURE CORE /swoons)

end boss: turrets (well that’s not particularly difficult, just tip them over)

murderer: pbody (PBODY WHYYYY)

How Steph Learned To Not Take These Things Seriously And Then Drastically Failed, Ending With An Explosive Shower Of Misery And Betrayal

"Oh look there’s one of those click and drag things, I never take these things seriously but they’re fun ^^’ "

Best Friend: Wheatley - “OH. OH. EVERYTHING FROM THIS POINT ON IS NOW GOSPEL TRUTH. GOSPEL TRUTH, YOU HEAR? YES. YES GOOD.”

Partner: P-Body - “Yay I have been accepted by the Co-Op bots!”

First Kiss: GLaDOs - ” Oh wow :3 I hope that means she likes me”

Lover: Rick - “AHAHAHA AWWW YEAH <3 no complaints”

End Boss: Chell - “Jealous of how much the AIs have accepted me, hm? Maybe we could work something out, I don’t dislike you. Human attitudes change. Overall, not bad results!”

Murderer: ……….Wheatley. - “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WHY WHEATLEY WHY I THOUGHT YOU’D TURNED AWAY FROM THAT OLD PATH OF DESTRUCTION, WHY? WHY? WE WERE BEST FRIENDS, WHEATS. BEST FRIENDS.

CHELL. DID YOU PLUG HIM IN? I BET YOU PLUGGED HIM IN DIDN’T YOU. COULDN’T BEAR ME RUBBING SHOULDERS WITH ALL YOUR AMAZING LITTLE AI FRIENDS. COULDN’T BEAR ME ROMANCING RICK, COULD YOU? WELL YOU KNOW WHAT, CHELL, HE IS A BLACK BELT IN THE BEDROOM. OH YES. AND NOW YOU’LL NEVER KNOW BECAUSE WHEATLEY’S GONNA TEAR THIS WHOLE DAMN PLACE DOWN. … IT’S DAYTIME, YOU CAN’T MAKE PORTALS ON THE SUN. YOU DANGEROUS MUTE LUNATIC.

RICK, I MAY I DIE FROM MY WOUNDS, BUT KNOW I LOVED YOU. AND IF NOT, WHEATLEY, I’M GOING TO GET THEM TO DOWNLOAD MY THOUGHTS INTO SOME KIND OF ANDROID AND MAKE YOUR LIFE A LIVING ROBOT HELL, BECAUSE I CARED ABOUT YOU IMMENSELY. AND YOU THREW IT BACK IN MY FACE. I DIDN’T THINK YOU WERE A TOTAL MORON. YOU’VE PROVED ME WRONG, YOUR STUPIDITY REALLY KNOWS NO BOUNDS.

THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE FOR ME, GLADOS AND PBODY. FINISH THE ANDROID THING, AND I’LL SEE YOU SOON IN MY NEW LIFE. NOW IF YOU DON’T MIND, I WOULD LIKE TO LOSE CONSCIOUSNESS AND DIE NEAR MY COMPANION CUBE.”

….”Yeah. I don’t want to play these things anymore.”

atropomorph:

It’s a screenshot. I… I mean, err
Why is he so bloody huge?.. 

 bloody massive

atropomorph:

It’s a screenshot. I… I mean, err

Why is he so bloody huge?.. 


bloody massive

Stupid dream recall time!

I miss getting toys in cereal. Last night I had a dream that this brand of cereal were doing that, and it was tiny, flat, light-up keyrings of the Portal 2 Cores. When you pressed the lens they lit up and said something, and they came in in some cute packaging.

The funniest thing ever was that Wheatley’s packaging was inside out and he was in the package backwards :3 d’awwwww bless your metal heart, little Intelligence Dampening Core.

Anyways, I went on a cereal buying rampage Stephen Merchant and Snake Plissken were in the queue, which is odd and I managed to collect all 4 of them, and was on webcam to Zelly and Tom who had them too and we were like “Why can’t we hold all these Cores” - but then I woke up and had a good five seconds of aww yeah where are my cores and then I had to come to terms with the fact it wasn’t real and I haven’t seen cereal prizes since I was about ten. 

D: 

I feel old. 

roses-and-secret-lives:

Stay as far as you can from science, my dear.

roses-and-secret-lives:

Stay as far as you can from science, my dear.

I think Wheatley has an anxiety disorder.

momoneymoboolits:

wolveswithhats:

unholystagepresence:

I only say this because I realize how much Wheatley and I seem to think alike. I honestly think that Wheatley thinks/knows that he’s a moron, and has this little voice in his head constantly berating him for every decision he ever makes, which is why he’s always so damned nervous and insecure, and why he reacts so badly to being called a moron by GLaDOS.

I unno…just a bit of headcanon, I guess.

Oh, I agree. I mean, I don’t know if a robot can have a disorder, but I definitely think he’s aware of his (lack of) intelligence. It actually surprises me a little when people headcanon that he’s totally oblivious about it, because would he really react so violently to the accusations if he didn’t have a complex about it?

I also don’t think he’s quite as dumb as everyone else either. More a lack of forethought than necessarily straight up stupid.

Someone on TV Tropes pointed out that, in order for Wheatley to consistently pick the worst possible decision he can make in a situation, he has to have the processing capability to think of every possible outcome for every possible decision he can make. He literally has to think through an infinite number of scenarios before choosing one. And if you think about it, he also has to do that thinking in an infinitesimally small amount of time, making him extremely intelligent, and if not intelligent, well-programmed and technologically advanced.

That being said, this processing capability of his seems to be subconscious, so he seems to pick the “wrong” choice every time without understanding why. He’s aware that something is not right about how he thinks, but he can’t quite put his finger on it, or, at least, he refuses to. Imagine being told that it’s IN YOUR BONES to be dumb. That’s enough to make one mentally hightail it in the opposite direction and try to prove that that “programmed stupidity” does not exist when it always has existed and always will exist.

What would give Wheatley anxiety is that no matter how hard he tries, he can’t escape his own programming. He suffers from complete insecurity. He walks a tightrope of his own creation: with every little thing he does, he doesn’t want to come across as stupid, so he puffs himself up with pride while simultaneously taking extreme pains not to come across as stupid.

The fact that his efforts always result in failure, no matter how hard he tries, would set him on edge and give him the necessary emotional push he needs to snap halfway through the game.

Aww

I love Wheatley

Thought his ideas were alright until somebody in-game told me he was programmed to be a moron -_- …

And then there’s Adventure Core who hasn’t been on any adventures,
And have you heard the crap ‘Fact’ Core comes out with?
And Space Core has no way of getting to space by itself - at least Space Core ends up in space but in the non-used dialogue ends up wanting to go home

What a bunch they are. They really should stick together.

i should finish my wheatley cosplay shouldnt i

yes

oh but i can’t sew help

ohohohohohoho

because jumper is also clothing

oh wheats

askaperturelab:


Anything for you, anon.

ARGH THIS IS AWESOME BUT IT&#8217;S LIKE THAT NIGHTMARE I HAD ONE TIME - ACTUALLY IT WAS A PRETTY GOOD DREAM UNTIL I WOKE UP AND REALISED WHO HAD BEEN IN IT WITH ME THEN IT WAS AWKWARD.
Omg though, looooove askaperturelab so much

askaperturelab:

Anything for you, anon.

ARGH THIS IS AWESOME BUT IT’S LIKE THAT NIGHTMARE I HAD ONE TIME - ACTUALLY IT WAS A PRETTY GOOD DREAM UNTIL I WOKE UP AND REALISED WHO HAD BEEN IN IT WITH ME THEN IT WAS AWKWARD.

Omg though, looooove askaperturelab so much